I'm sure that the conflict I will present will be shared by many. As a stay at home mom, my husband and I are at odds about household chores. For example, he believes that if I am the person at home, then all household duties fall to me. I believe that if we live in the same household, then household duties should be shared. It becomes frustrating, when he will not even load the dishwasher.
I am trying to take everything i am learning and trying to apply it. It is easier said than done especially when I think I am right and he is wrong. First, I learned I need to compromise more. Maybe I need to negotiate with my husband certain duties. Maybe we just need to be better connected so we can give and receive mutually.
Any advice on how to effectively communicate my desire for equitable distribution of chores?
Johan, I totally agree with you about sharing the household chores. As an educators it is our job to earn the trust in our spouse and as well as our children. In doing so, children and their families are made to feel comfortable sharing their ideas and experiences together. Working together will make a better relationship.
The picture you selected really addressed the topic you chose to discuss. i had the same concerns with my husband and it would turn into heated disagreements.
The turning point was after I had my last child and he had to do the chores because neither of our mothers' had time to help me, he saw that I wasn't being unreasonable. He now does he share and I had to accept that their are things he just does not want to do. Since I know I will complete it more effectively than he will, I go ahead and do it.
I know that feeling all too well. What I have done is started complaining on how much housework there is and how I will have to stay up all night to get it done. My husband hates to hear me complain so he gets up and starts helping. I love the image you had chosen as well. Since there are three of you in the house who are able to clean I wonder if one should make a chart of all the chores that need to be done and color code it. For example, your mom can be pink, you can be green and your husband can be blue. Then each week you take turns doing things. One week he cooks dinner, you take out the trash and you mom cleans the kitchen and then the next week you all switch.
Any advice on how to effectively communicate my desire for equitable distribution of chores?
Johan,
ReplyDeleteI totally agree with you about sharing the household chores. As an educators it is our job to earn the trust in our spouse and as well as our children. In doing so, children and their families are made to feel comfortable sharing their ideas and experiences together. Working together will make a better relationship.
Hi Johan,
ReplyDeleteThe picture you selected really addressed the topic you chose to discuss. i had the same concerns with my husband and it would turn into heated disagreements.
The turning point was after I had my last child and he had to do the chores because neither of our mothers' had time to help me, he saw that I wasn't being unreasonable. He now does he share and I had to accept that their are things he just does not want to do. Since I know I will complete it more effectively than he will, I go ahead and do it.
I know that feeling all too well. What I have done is started complaining on how much housework there is and how I will have to stay up all night to get it done. My husband hates to hear me complain so he gets up and starts helping. I love the image you had chosen as well. Since there are three of you in the house who are able to clean I wonder if one should make a chart of all the chores that need to be done and color code it. For example, your mom can be pink, you can be green and your husband can be blue. Then each week you take turns doing things. One week he cooks dinner, you take out the trash and you mom cleans the kitchen and then the next week you all switch.
ReplyDelete