I have heard homophobic terms used as an insult by a child toward another child. When I taught second grade there was a young boy that I believe had homophobic tendencies. He was very feminine and would write about boys that he thought was cute. He would write in his journal certain things and there were certain incidences that occurred. One day while in the schoolyard, he had chased a boy around in order to kiss him. The other young boy, who was also in my class was horrified, embarrassed, and afraid. He didn't want student A to keep bothering him. Student B knew Student A liked him but he didn't like him back. Student B was afraid that he would be teased about the kiss. This was SECOND grade. I stressed to the class that we respect people's personal space and we are not to touch anyone. Also, I met with Student A's father and told him what had occurred and about the other boy feeling uncomfortable because his son was "bothering" him. This was a single dad going through a terrible divorce and was at a loss. I also brought it to administration's attention because I didn't want an incident to occur in the bathrooms while at lunch or if I was absent. The class did tease Student A and called him a "fag". I talked about words that hurt and that we treat everyone with respect. That behavior would not be tolerated at all. I dealt with urban kids who were very street smart and I talked to them about the consequences of their behavior. I also touched upon gender issues with that class. I love to teach using William's Doll by Charlotte Zolotow.
I have to admit that this topic about homophobia and dealing with it in the classroom with very young children makes me very uncomfortable. I have a 2 1/2 year old who attends nursery school. I have to admit I don't want her exposed to these things so young. I don't think how people choose to have sex should be anyone's business. I would feel very uncomfortable not knowing how the classroom teacher would approach this topic. I wouldn't want my daughter exposed to these things so early. Does that make me a homophobe? I don't think so. Maybe I am wrong.
I agree that young children do not need to be introduced to different sexual relationships that people have - but this includes monogamous heterosexual relationships as well. However, family is not based on sex alone, and children these days will come across many different family arrangements. In fact, in my three year old classroom this year I have a little girl whose parents happen to be a lesbian couple. They are wonderful parents and wonderful people. The rest of the class simply is exposed, and it is important for this particular girls sake and for the future of society that the children be able to ask about situations like this, be given honest answers about love and family, and be made to feel that this arrangement is acceptable.
ReplyDeleteJohan,
ReplyDeleteYour post this week has been very honest and makes it challenging to anwer. I too have a young child who is 3 and I would not want him to be exposed to sexual content in any form. However, when it comes to depicting gays it is not as easy. There are children's books who explore children with 2 fathers or 2 mothers. This would be acceptable even at a young age. Wouldn't you agree? I think it is very difficult to discuss diverse lifestyles since we may not always agree with them. Yet, I can see were your concerns lay with a teacher who may address the topic in an inappropriate manner.